Comments on: Why do you care? Or how do you care?

By: Sherry Peyton

Sherry Peyton — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 21:01:17 +0000

your points are very valid and worth pondering by all the have countries. Indeed your words strike deeply at all of us who individually reach out to “help” others. There is often I believe a thinly veiled condensention at work, even though it is not intentional or even realized for the most part. It is important to always remember this tendency lest we continue in our ignorance of being “better” than those we seek to help.

By: Laura

Laura — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 20:04:27 +0000

Oh on a slightly different note too:
Its nice to know you are doing something worthwhile, making a difference, its nice to be affirmed and recognised. But it really is so easy to let those superficial things motivate you! You have to be pretty vigilant not to let it happen. Its a bit like that proverb:
As the crucible tests silver and the furnace gold, so a man is tested by the praise he receives. (Prov 27:21)

And it leads to fighting for recognition and unwillingness to work with other people and share the glory… not great!

By: Laura

Laura — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 20:00:03 +0000

I guess it was about a year ago now when I realised you can have a good heart, and help people, you can really do good, but you can still do it in a superior way. That treats people more like dogs to be fed or oil-drenched penguins to be cleaned, than people. Where you stand above people and benevolently give them what you feel they should have, and tell them they should live the way you think they should live. And feel yourself the gracious giver, and them the grateful receiver.

Which is so terrible. Yuck. And the saddest thing is that you can actually treat people like that from a real desire to help, and out of real kindness and compassion. Just having shrunk the people you are helping, in your mind, to hungry stomachs to be fed and dirty bodies to be washed.

I have a friend who often reminds us that just because someone it poor, it doesn’t mean they don’t have hopes and dreams, families and talents. Personalities, capabilities. God given destinies.

By: Damian

Damian — Sat, 31 May 2008 00:55:49 +0000

Yep, the ducks got a mention in vow 8.1.

The boss is in Nairobi and loving it. Adjusting to a new organisation and all that, but doing well. Her first trip into Somalia takes place next week. I’m keen to get there myself. Not long now!

By: angryafrican

angryafrican — Fri, 30 May 2008 19:11:40 +0000

@SanityFound – See? The Ubuntu way… I saw what you are doing over there. And it speaks to the heart of who and what we are on our little continent.

@a broad – You are right. I don’t mind why they do it. As long as we get them to do something. But I would still like everyone to think why they do it. Shouldn’t stop them doing it. Should just make them think why they do it.

@Damian – Thanks man. That means a lot. I sometimes struggle to post something I think might insult people. And I know you two don’t fall in this category. Because you reflect. And that’s maybe the difference. We reflect to make sure we are comfortable with who we are. Oh, I had to laugh when you mentioned the UN statement. I can actually see how the two of you got there! But that happens when you live a life worth caring about. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if ducks were mentioned in there either. How is she doing by the way?

By: Damian

Damian — Fri, 30 May 2008 18:23:40 +0000

I’m glad you wrote this, mate, and I’m glad that you went ahead and posted it here even when you’d thought about it a second time. I needed to read it.

My wife and I have talked about these kinds of things a lot. In fact, this whole question of what should be done, how to do it, and why, was rattling around our heads as we wrote our wedding vows! We talked about this in the context of, yes, going out into the world to do something positive, but also in terms of who we want to be as individuals, and how we wish to raise our family.

I tell you what, our wedding vows started to sound like a bloody UN declaration on human development! We toned it down a little before the big day.

Motivation – an individual’s rationale for doing what they do – is important when it comes to “aid work” or “development work”. For all the reasons you have stated here, yes, and also because some of those whose motivations are not entirely sound (or who haven’t really taken the time to think about why they are doing what they are doing) quite simply do a shit job. And that causes more harm than good.

One day soon I hope to join the ranks of these “fight the good fight” characters. At the moment I am pretty sure of my motivations because they have been slowly brewing over many years. On that day when someone reaches out their hand to me and invites me to walk with them, I reckon I’ll know for sure whether my reasons are the right ones or not.

By: a broad

a broad — Fri, 30 May 2008 15:15:55 +0000

To be honest, I don’t care what their personal motivations are – if all it is is to let them sleep better at night, fine – I am just thankful that the celebs like Bono and Bob Geldof highlight problems and bring attention to them. Would the world really have known as much about Darfur or Ethiopia if it were not for people like there? If you were starving in Ethiopia, would you care what the motivation was behind that bowl of porridge you have just gotten? I wouldn’t.
And you can always really tell the genuine from the fake. Put Bono or the late Audrey Hepburn next to a Spice Girl – there is a difference there.

By: SanityFound

SanityFound — Fri, 30 May 2008 13:27:12 +0000

Thank you for this, every word said in this post has been my thoughts and my feelings on the way people manipulate for the “greater” good perhaps in most cases just for their ego or to boost societies ratings. If you are going to give something to someone else, help out, etc is there really a need to publicise it. If someone comes to us to ask where they can help (oneworldonesoul.wordpress.com) then we guide them … no branding no nothing, it is us in this together, no you and me, just us.