What’s up in the news?
Condoleezza Rice, or Condi to her friends, spend a bit of time in Baghdad this week. Good for you Condoleezza. It is much better than staying in that big white house up on the hill. You know that guy will work your fingers to the bone. Anyway, she spent time shopping in the “Green Zone” I think. Must be. Why else would she be saying something like this? “Obviously, the American forces are here, coalition forces are here at the invitation of the Iraqi government.” WTF? I don’t think so Condoleezza. Remember that you send those big tanks and flying objects called missiles into Iraq? I didn’t see the letter of invitation. Oh, you mean these guys in charge now? The puppets you put in place? With a fake vote that reminds us of Florida style democracy? I don’t think so Condoleezza. Crap stays crap. Whether in DC or Baghdad. Let’s get this straight Condoleezza, you are not invited to my house. With or without a gun in your hand and a tank at your feet.
2. McCain playing the age card
I think McCain might be playing the age card after weeks of playing the race card and the celeb card and the general lies and snake oil card. This time it was all about Russia and the “Georgia incident”. No. Not Atlanta. Anyway. He made another “misspoke” when commenting on the Russian invasion. And I quote, “in the 21st century, nations don’t invade other nations”. Huh? Excuse me? Did I miss something? Or is it your age playing up? Did you get a free coupon to invade Iraq? I can’t even say grow up. McCain. McCain. McCain. You are one scary dude.

For McCain
I really couldn’t find a better heading for this guy. A guy from Nigeria has been told to divorce his wife. No wait. His wives. He has to whittle it down to four wives and no more. So he’ll have to divorce 82 of them. WTF? Dude! Doos! I don’t know what to say? The four that are staying are asking what the hell did they do wrong that they have to stay with him? Guess how many kids he has? 170. He had just under 2 children with each wife. Lesson? They thought the first time was just a bit of a… hum… problem… anxiety. The second time? They realized it wasn’t. You can fool some of the people some of the time…
It seems as if Mugabe has decided to not continue the talks with Tsvangirai. I am not surprised. Mugabe doesn’t give a damn. And neither does my President. Mbeki. Blood on your hands. Go share what I gave McCain further up. And up yours. If Mugabe is the African Than Shwe (Burma), then you are the African Bush. No. Not the African bush.

A dick and a prick
5. Buy at employee price… if you can find one
GM has been taking a pounding in the sales department over here in the US. But they hit back with a brilliant new ad campaign. You can now buy a car at the employee price. Cool isn’t it? We know how much discount those guys get. Should work. Shouldn’t it? It should. If you can find an employee willing to sell you a car. It seems that most of the models just don’t make it to the dealers. And the salesmen doesn’t show up either. Great plan GM. Get the people to come into the showrooms to buy a car that isn’t there from a salesman that isn’t there either. I think Toyota might have a better plan. Sell people a car they want. I know. It is way unorthodox but it might just work.
6. How to kill the American Dream
How do you kill the American Dream? Bureaucracy… We’ve seen it everywhere in America. Little kids learning the rules of making money by selling goodies at roadside stands. Simple stuff. Lemonade, veggies, ice-cream and other stuff the can grow themselves or mix themselves. Just pretty simple stuff. Nothing much. But it teaches them the basics of how to be an entrepreneur. It’s as American as apple pie. But not anymore. At least not in Clayton, California. A little girl and her brother used to sell some veggies they grew in their back yard. Until the cops showed up. And dispersed the illegal merchants. Stupid right? And you would expect the Mayor to back the kids. Think again. “They may start out with a little card-table and selling a couple of things, but then who is to say what else they have. Is all the produce made there, do they grow it themselves? Are they going to have eggs and chickens for sale next,” said Clayton Mayor Gregg Manning. Mayor Manning, go get some of that McCain coffee offer I have up there. Stupid.
Remember to read between the lies… I mean lines.
August 22, 2008 at 7:04 am
Shame on that mayor, seriously thats ridiculous
August 22, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Goodness gracious what was he thinking?
I enjoy your take on the news, it’s about the only news I’ve been reading as I was o a month long news break.
August 22, 2008 at 1:49 pm
Condy:
The wicked witch was in Baghdad? Is it just me or is it that she compulsivly shops during disasters? Like a reflex, maybe, see wreckage, shop shop…
Pavlov would be proud…
McCain:
I think the problem is one of two things:
1) He mistook Georgia for Georgia. That’s why we were all Georgains for a week, er at least until good ‘ol Sassy lost…
2) Georgia is somewhere near the Iraq/Pakistan border, I think, and poor McCain, having left his atlas in his Seventh House, was permanantly hamstrung mentally, as he could only remember owning three…
LOVE the poster!
Nigerian Super-adultery:
This gives new meaning to the 1.8 kids, a car, a chicken in every pot, and a white picket fence…
Doesn’t this mean unemployment in his vilage will also rise 82%?
The Chin and Mbeki:
Who even thought this was nothing but window dressing. It’s a shame that Tsvangirai has to go through this, but forgive me, AA:
Mbeki is a boneless turd!
Feel free to insult Bush in retaliation for my trangression into the SA political arena. I never liked Our Idjit In Cheef anyway…
August 24, 2008 at 7:04 am
Are African politics still delivered at the point of a machete? Just asking. Perhaps America could learn from Africa. Naaa?
August 26, 2008 at 7:41 am
@Saffer – You get idiots everywhere.
@cooper – Thanks! Huge compliment coming from you. You know your stuff so really, huge thanks.
@Keven Bennett – Must say I love that poster as well! And great comment on the Nigerian! Feel free to take pot shot at Mbeki. We all have a little Bush heading up our country. Unfortunately!
@Wow – Welcome, my friend from Newsbusters. As I told you before… Africa is a continent and not a country. It will be like me saying North America and talk as if Mexico, Canada and the US are all the same. You want lessons on what America can learn from Africa? One word (and go look it up yourself): Ubuntu.